ALGUNOS CHISTES. SOME JOKES!

Buenos días mis queridos bloggers, vamos a empezar la semanita con una sonrisa.
Hi my dear bloggers, let's start the week with a smile!

** THE HUMAN BEING ORIGINS
One day a little girl asked her father: "Daddy, how did the human being (ser humano)  start?"
He answered: "Well, let me tell you, God made Adam and Eve and they had children and that's how mankind (humanidad)  was created".
Three days later the little girl asked her mother the same question.
Her mother answered:  "A lot of years ago there were monkeys (monos)  and the human race (raza humana) evolved (evolucionó)  from them."

The confused girl came back (volvió)  to her father and said: "Daddy, I can't understand! You told me that humans were created by God, but mummy said that they developed (se desarrollaron) from monkeys?"
Her father answered:  "Well, dear, it's simple:  I told you about my family and your mom told you about hers!"

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** DEAR LUCY
A man is in prison for robbing more than 30 banks.  One day he receives a letter from his wife which says:

Dear John
As you are in prison I will have to plant the tomatoes in the garden myself.  When is the best season (estación) to do it?
Love
Lucy.

The man's reply (respuesta) was:
Dear Lucy
Don't plant the tomatoes in the garden until I have hidden (escondido)  the money from the ban robberies.
Love
John

A few days later he receives another letter...
Dear John,
It's horrible.  Yesterday thirty policemen came to the house and dug up (cavaron) a huge (enorme) whole (agujeto) in the garden, but they didn't find anything.
Love
Lucy

The man's reply was...

Dear Lucy,
Now , it is the best time to plant the tomatoes.
Love
John
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** CARPET
An old woman had bought a new carpet (moqueta) and the carpet fitted (el instalador de moqueta) was fitting it for her.
At a moment, the man went out of the house to smoke a cigarette but he couldn't find the packet.
He looked in his pockets and in his van (furgoneta), but he couldn't find them.  So, he went back into the room where he had fitted the carpet and he saw a small lump (bulto) under the carpet in the middle of the room so he decided to flatten (alisar, nivelar) it; he took a hammer (martillo) and banged (golpear) the carpet until it was really flat (lisa).

Suddenly, the woman walked into the room. She was holding (sujetando) a packet of cigarettes. She said: "I have found this in the hallway (pasillo) and I suppose it's yours but now I've got a problem because I can't find my budgie (periquito).  Have you seen it? ...

HAVE A NICE DAY!!